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6

Campbell pleads for a bit more time

 

Pig Hunters coach Tom Campbell has made a passionate plea to essenn, asking the manager to let him continue on in the top job until the end-of-season break. With Campbell’s last official game as coach coming up this weekend against Orca United, the gaffer has requested to stay on just a little bit longer…

“I have been in charge of the Pig Hunters for six seasons now. During this time, I’ve been a coach of the Oceania NT, had some decent Oceania Cup runs, survived the great financial crisis last season, took the Pigs to div III, and introduced a number of home-grown talents into the senior squad. I’ve enjoyed my time here and have no regrets at all.”

“For the past three season, we’ve participated in GL5. Our Cup run this season meant we couldn’t play any qualifiers, but we somehow managed to sneak into the GL Masters. Now that we have reached the semi-final stage, I would love the opportunity to see the quest for GL5 glory out to the very end. I know my last game in charge is this weekend, but I ask essenn to please let me finish the job and lead the Pigs in our battle against Rochdale United. Don’t let me go just yet, I still have unfinished business before I’m done…”

Campbell - hoping to still be the coach for the GL Masters!

Campbell – hoping to still be the coach for the GL Masters!

 

Although nothing has been released by the Club, it’s understood that essenn will grant Campbell his wish and let him continue on as coach until the GL campaign is officially over. Only time will tell…

 

5

Back in black for Jack

 

The long awaited return of essenn to the blog finally happened today, however it wasn’t at all as expected. There was no press conference, no questions from journalists, no angry mob baying for blood – instead, it was just a simple press release that was sent via email, fax, pigeons, and morse code to anyone that cared…

“I do not offer any excuses for my lack of communication, other than my lack of excuses. The time will come soon when this blog will be updated on a regular basis. But that time is not now… so you’ll have to wait a bit longer!”

“As most of you will know, I’m a bit of a music fan. It’s saddened my heart to hear of the recent passing of Jack Bruce, the bassist/vocalist of the worlds first supergroup, Cream. Along with Eric Clapton and Ginger Baker, Bruce was part of a talented trio (at that time, the best of the best!) that lasted only two years… but what an impact they made!”

“As a mark of respect to the late great Jack Bruce, both the Pig Hunters and the Camberwell Cobras will be playing in special black kits this week.

RIP Jack – thanks for the music, and long may it live!”

 

 

 

 

 

4

Dunn – ‘Pigs ready to rumble!’

 

With the new season about to kick-off – and with manager essenn nowhere to be seen – club secretary Ova Dunn took it upon himself to hold the first press conference of the current campaign…

Ova Dunn - taking control whilst essenn is away..??

Ova Dunn – taking control whilst essenn is away? Either very brave or very stupid…

“I apologize for essenn not being here – it appears that he has other things to do rather than attend his beloved Pig Hunters season launch! With that said, let me assure all fans and supporters that the Club is aiming to win IV.53 this season. We let everyone down by finishing in 4th position last season, and we are hell-bent on at least challenging for the title this time around.”

“Despite rumours over the past months that coach Tom Campbell would not be around to see the new campaign, as it stands he will lead the Pigs into a record 6th season! I am glad that essenn has decided to stick by the legendary coach – and I’m personally confident that Campbell can repay the faith and deliver the goods.”

“With the recent Oceania Cup restructure, I’ve decided to lower the expectations for this competition – our aim now is to reach round 4. I’d also like to quash rumours of player sales… no senior Pig player will be sold this campaign! And I will also investigate why so many fans are leaving the Club… something dodgy is going on and I intend to find out exactly what or who the reason is behind it.”

“We’ve got a long tough season ahead of us, and hopefully it will be a successful one… we are ready to rumble!”

 

Dunn also revealed that the Pigs will be playing all home games in a predominantly black kit this season – a change from the traditional green that the Club has used throughout most of their history. When asked what the reason was behind the decision, Dunn pointed out that the Pigs had used a black kit before in the past and that it seemed more than reasonable to use it again… yes, the Pigs are Back in Black!

 

 

 

1

End-of-Season Awards

In a low key event held last night, selected members and guests were on hand for the Pig Hunters’ annual end-of-season awards. Manager essenn kept the formalities short and sweet…

“To begin with, I won’t be reviewing the season tonight… I already did that a few weeks ago!”

“Instead, I would like to start by inducting 2 new players to the ‘100 Club’. Only 5 players in the past have represented the Pigs in over 100 official matches – Scotney, Chudasama, Cacavelos, Adelørn, and Ova Dunn. These great Pig legends are now joined by Jovan Janić and Reginald Mercurio, who both made their 100 appearance for the Pigs during the past season. Congratulations to both of these fine stalwarts of the Club.”

“With the recent announcement by HT of off-season friendlies, it is with great pleasure that we have arranged a match this Sunday against our good friends at Seaford FC. Almost all Pig fans will remember that come-from-behind win in last seasons’ Cup fixture against the Sharks, a win that gave me (and the Pigs) bragging rights over fellow manager Dough_Boy. The up-coming game is only a friendly and will be played at a neutral stadium… so regardless of the result, we will still be laughing afterwards 😀 “

“And with that all said and done, I now present you with this seasons Award winners…”

Pig of the Season:  Glenn Harrison Harrison

11 goals for the season and voted 9 times as MVP, Harrison takes out another PoS gong… all this despite his form being less than acceptable for most of the season. He gets to wear the famous no.13 shirt for the next campaign.

 

 

Young Pig of the Season:  Garry Bell Bell

The former Piglet takes the award over another former Piglet in Ross Oram. With not much separating the two players, the final decision was made due to the fact the Bell scored more goals throughout the season.

 

 

Top Scorer:  Rob Arkell Arkell

The most expensive signing in Pig Hunters’ history knocked in 23 goals in his first season with the Club, including 8 goals in the Cup. Unlucky not to win the PoS, the 22 year old is well on the way to Pig ‘legend’ status.