The Animal Is Let Loose

Saturday, 10th February

The Lost Saxons’ Youth Team Head Coach has given scout Jermaine ‘The Animal’ Blythe the green light to go ‘wild’ and scour the country, and make contact with Fed colleagues around the globe, as the Saxons prepare for life without Martin ‘Runaway Train’ Frain and company.

BiddleBlytheTom ‘Cupcake’ Biddle (left) with Jermaine ‘The Animal’ Blythe

“First stop, is Greater Manchester.”

RayVyas“We’ve been in intense discussions with Blackley Bombers, and are pleased to announce the signing of Ray Vyas, a great 17-year-old talent with a penchant for the unpredictable. He’ll be thrown straight into this weekend’s league game.

He’s got a bit of an edge to him, but so did I – and that’s why I like him,” said a smiling Jermaine Blythe.

Next stop? “I’m catching a plane shortly, to Switzerland, St. Gallen to be precise.”

Updates on Sunday 11th February:

Breaking news this morning – we have learnt overnight, that Blythe has delayed his trip to St. Gallen, and will be flying in to Oviedo in North-Western Spain, intent on checking out a potential talent in Asturias first. Interesting…

Mid-Afternoon Update:

Confirmed! Blythe wins huge transfer battle with 2 Spanish giants to secure the signing of 17-year-old
unpredictable player Abel Echauri, for just under a million Euros. Big signing.

“I am ecstatic to have signed for the Saxons, as they attempt to rebuild their team for the future. I know there were some big Spanish teams trying to secure my services, but now I wear the white dragon, and I am only looking to the first game I will play.”

We understand, that Echuria is already on a fast jet to England, having passed his medical, and only time will tell if he will make it in time to play in this evening’s league game. Exciting news for Saxons fans – more as we have it, and we presume, from Switzerland as we reported earlier.

Sunday evening updates:


Mr. Blythe has just been in touch with our blog, after failing to secure a deal in Switzerland for a young winger. Here is what he had to say, as he phoned us from a flight he is now on to Ozbekistan.

“Hi there Saxons fans, I’m really having a successful trip despite the disappointing negotiations tonight. I’m thrilled for our two new signings, and especially Echuria who scored a hattrick on his debut only hours after arriving in England! Amazing! They will both be great young additions to our team, and will only get better and better.

I’ve been talking on the phone with Mr. Á Nesi, and he says he was quite impressed with our young Palestinian forward Abu Zama’ who also scored a hattrick in the league game today, and so he has told me to focus on only one more signing for the training spots, for now. I think Abu Zama’ has really gotten himself noticed – good for him.

I’m currently on my way to Ozbekistan – never been there before, but I’ve been told there might be a nice young talent. I got a message from Mentor C while I was in Spain. Apparently he is on holiday in Gran Canaria, and heard I was passing through, so he gave me a heads-up about a young player named Freze. I thought, cool. Ok, sorry… bad joke. I’ll update soon! Animal out.”

  • post will update as ‘The Animal’ updates us!


Late Sunday evening, word has reached us that the Saxons board have successfully negotiated the contract with former Syrian U-20 forward, Zakaria Al-Kaled. This signing was not carried out by social media scout of the moment, Jermaine Blythe, though we understand the hefty fee for Al-Kaled means that Blythe will be authorised to sign only one more youngster before returning to The Burial Ground. We are led to believe that the youngster involved is based in Ozbekistan, in the Samarqand Viloyati region. We will update tomorrow as we hear of any developments.