Press Announcements Archive

4

WozzaNoski : Oceanian U20 NT Election Candidate!

ATTENTION!
NEWS FLASH!

Yep!
You heard it here 1st!

News has just come to hand down here at EVIL INCORPORATED HQ!

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Many quick and heated phone-calls and text messages have been ‘zinging’ around the various board members of EVIL INC on this balmy spring Melbourne evening.. and it’s fair to say that all of our fellow senior management were quite un-aware of such an outcome..

Our current and much loved Team General Manager WozzaNoski has put his managerial hat in the ring for the Oceanian U-20 NT gig..
And with this election speech as can be seen here..

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We are shocked at the timing of this, as we believe that any HT NT gig is a fulltime job which requires a managers fullest of attention.. not only on the team itself, but as a wider role involved in the community, on the public forums, also in private NT based federations and of course the currently used way for Oceanians to communicate about their NT’s.. (Slack Channel)..

We’d like to mention that it was to our belief that WozzaNoski has never ever even begun to use (Slack Channel)…
So while we have always known him to be a very keen follower of Oceania’s NT teams, and he’s always been pro-active with logging into Oceania’s NT scouting portal to check on local talent, this decision still comes as a massive shock.. and it’s also very last minute too.. with the election more than half way through..

More importantly though.. is how will this potential election outcome affect his abilities to manage our great club.. EVIL INC!?

It’s fair to say that an immediate board meeting will take place down in the conference rooms of the Somerville Super Stadium, of which this news will be discussed at length, and I’m sure WozzaNoski himself will want to make it clear where he stands.. on many matters..

Even myself as EVIL INC Media Manager find this decision mind-boggling.. the timing coinciding with EVIL INC’s 1st ever venture into Oceania’s Division II.. a Season of most importance, further respect needs to be achieved at club level before 1 can assume such a significant role I surely would have thought..?!

We will see how this all progresses over these next 3 days..

Kind Regards..
EVIL INCORPORATED Media Manager!

3

BLOG WARS – Episode I

Here it is everyone..
The Blog Post you have all been waiting for…

BLOG WARS

EPISODE I

EVIL INCORPORATED Vs SITH BROTHERHOOD

EVIL INCORPORATED

EVIL INCORPORATED

VS

SITH BROTHERHOOD

SITH BROTHERHOOD

From everyone in Senior Management down at EVIL INC.. we hope you all enjoy the following creation..

…”an idea from WozzaNoski himself it was”…

Enjoy..

 EVIL Vs SITH

Kind Regards..

EVIL INC Media Manager..

2

Gunning For Glory!

Oceanian Mafia Mobster WozzaNoski has come out swinging recently by laying-down the gauntlet to his fellow HTUM Fed (Hattrick United Managers Federation) members with some really juicey match fixtures coming up during this Hattrick Off-Season..

upcoming

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EVIL INCORPORATED are currently taking part in the 31st version of the HTUM Challenge Trophy Tournament, which we are a genuine title chance with some big teams missing from action in this edition..

“must be running scared of our Mighty EVIL INC”

As WozzaNoski was heard sniggering to himself off to the otherside of the room here at EVIL INC HQ..

Our Senior Management down at EVIL INC would like to thank manager ‘ballinho’ from FC Prague Slivers for the invite to this most respected Tournament, a Tournament that many world-wide gun managers have won in the past.. Unfortunately our manager WozzaNoski has not added this trophy to the EVIL INC Victory Cabinet as yet but we are sure he plans to rectify this situation at the completion of this Tournament..

So far 1 match has been completed in the initial Group Stage, and that came against little known manager ‘irtap’ from the club ‘cristea’ whom are located in Division IV over in Italy, which is a pretty decent effort considering at last check Italy had 10 HT Divisions from memory.. Unfortunately this match ended in a 2-2 draw with both teams being very similar in ratings output, WozzaNoski will want to put this lame result behind him and re-focus on the next fixture..

Up next is ‘Rustyjack’ whom manages a Scottish club by the name of Polomint, this mob is hovering down in Division IV in Scotland which we find mind-boggling as we have always found Rusty to be of a quality nature.. someone who really could and should be up in the higher levels of HT by now… especially in such a fellow small HT nation as Scotland is… We as Senior Management feel the local betting agencies would have us as a clear favourite to take this match and see us in a good position to progress from the group in readiness for the Playoffs..

The 3rd and last match of the Group Stage is against FC Runenberg who are managed by Chief_Roger who is a manager with a wealth of experience and doing his best to survive the competitiveness of the Swiss Hattrick levels.. and 1 must not forget that he is of most importance in the HTUM FED, with providing us with all the past and current details of the famous Golden League. And again the local betting agencies would have us EVIL INC as a slight favourite to take out this match.

We really are proud with how our own club has progressed recently but are also excited with what the future may hold for us..
Fingers Crossed it’s many more Trophies to help fill-up the Victory Cabinet down at the S.S.S…

We also must not forget that during these Hattrick Off-Seasons is the chance to further compete against other fellow HTUM FED managers.. in the form of mid-week and weekend friendly matches, and again today we are currently up against manager ‘Rustyjack’ from Scotland and his Oceanian Platinum team called ‘Cabuie’.. a team that is growing rapidly and is commanding respect in not only the HTUM FED Golden League, but also in the HT levels of Oceania, a team that will be hard to beat, especially since friendlies are a chance for our EVIL INC manager WozzaNoski to roll-out some of the older players and or 2nd choice players for much needed game time.

And last but not least is another mention of a friendly match against HTUM FED member manager Brin_Chaser and his Bellevue Barage, a team that surprisingly is being relegated back down to Division IV in Oceania.. but on paper and also stats-wise are significantly stronger than our mighty EVIL INC.. they are much younger, better specs on players and can produce far superior match day ratings than our bunch of old farts.. just lucky for us there is nothing but bragging rights on the line in this match up… 😉

So all in all it’s going to be busy Off-Season period for manager WozzaNoski and our lads from EVIL INC..
Be sure to check our news-feeds daily for more potential updates from our Mighty EVIL INCORPORATED.

Kind Regards..
EVIL INC Media Manager.

3

Championship Day!

As dark clouds roll into the area surrounding the mighty Somerville Super Stadium, on this gloomy Spring Melbourne day.. it will not dampen the spirits of ‘The Brain Washed’ (our home crowd) on what is a truly momentous day for everyone involved with EVIL INCORPORATED..

And it’s fitting that we end such a great and successful season at home where we will be presented with the III.2 Series Champions Trophy.. Our 1st Oceanian Division III silverware, that will look glorious in full view in the ‘Victory Cabinet’ that is on display outside the main gate of our mighty Victorian battlefield.. the S.S.S…

trophyFrom us in Senior Management at EVIL INC we look forward to sharing the day and all its festivities that are planned with our adoring fans, paid-up members, players’ families and friends and of course our corporate sponsors whose hard earned dollars and support have really helped proppel this club up the rankings of Oceania in Hattrick.

Our day starts off with a $1000 / per head Corporate Sponsor breakfast gathering down at the Somerville Mechanics Hall… which is just a short walk down the street from our S.S.S.. This is a chance for players and their immediate family members to relax and mingle on game morning with the people and companies whose dollars have given not only the S.S.S its vibrant new look but also upgraded training facilities that are so needed in this time of proffessionalism.. we feel these new world class facilities have provided us with the tools to encourage the worlds best players to want to come and play for our great club, but to also help them get even better as players and as valued members of the community.. This event was sold out well over 2 weeks ago, with a great many people and companies not yet affiliated with us desperately wanting a seat..

somerville_hallAfter this our players will head back to the S.S.S for a brief run on the playing surface to help them get used to today’s weather and pitch conditions, anything to help blow-out some of those nerves which will no doubt be lingering .. and then back into the change rooms where our kit managers will have everything prepared, players can continue to encourage each other and really begin to soak-in the atmosphere and noise as the fans begin to make their way through the local streets singing our clubs chants in strong voice.. all the local Pubs and watering-holes will be full of colour (navy blue and white).. Days like today really do provide not only the town itself but the businesses in it the chance to really thrive.. and be a hive of activity..

Then at Midday local time we kick off the match at the Somerville Super Stadium against the ‘rottnest island quokkas’ who have travelled accross from interstate (South Australia), we are expecting a comfortable victory today against a severley understrength and rebuilding ‘quokkas’ which will really help complete the season..

Upon completion of the match there will be a Trophy Presentation put on by the Oceanian Football Association, our players will lift the trophy with pride, pose for photographs for the swarms of local print and digital media.. do a lap of honor around the S.S.S so that our fans can continue to soak it all up… and then  we can’t forget a new initiative has been put in place for this event, our players post match once changed and freshened-up will then board a large open-top bus and be taken down and through our local streets of Somerville with banners and trophy aloft so that the fans who couldn’t secure tickets to the last home game can sample the clubs success and festivities..

paradeWe again as Senior Management are really pleased with how the day will be structured so that everyone who loves EVIL INC can feel part of the club and its successes here now and into the future..

champions

Cheers and Kind Regards..

EVIL INC Media Manager..

2

Record Breaking Season

It’s official… History has been made down at the Somerville Super Stadium, home of the Mighty EVIL INCORPORATED!

We started our Hattrick history back in Season 25 as a club named ‘Woz’s Terrorists’.. in Oceanian Series VI.79… and boy.. what a time we’ve had battling it out in the lower divisions of Oceania.. and a few club name changes later…

4 seasons were spent splashing in the puddles of Division VI, then 3 seasons swimming in the shallows of Division V, then a brief stint up in Division IV for 2 seasons, then falling back down to Division V for a lengthy rebuild that lasted 9 seasons, and again dropping back to the duldrums of Division VI for a singular season…

And then came the rise.. and a rapid rise it has been.. considering that aforementioned history…

From season 43 in Division VI.. we have since piled-on the wins, and what comes with wins you ask..? Titles! Yep that’s what… and a bloody heap of ’em..

Season 44 we did the double and won that in Division V..
Season 45 we came 3rd in Division IV..
Season 46 we won the Division IV title and promoted..
Season 47 we came 6th in our 1st ‘crack’ at Division III with a league filled with gun managers and teams.. and unfortunately were relagated back down to Division IV..
Season 48 we won the Division IV title in a ‘canter’! Promoting again obviously..
Season 49 we came 2nd in our Division III, in what was a ‘steadier’ season..

history

and that leads us to now… Season 50.. in Oceania..

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EVIL INC not only reached our best ever outcome in the National Cup, finishing in the 8th Round..
But we now comfortably sit top of our Division III with plenty of room to spare for autopromotion up to the lofty heights of Division II..

promow13

And as you can see.. from the above pics supplied.. we have room to spare when considering the other Oceanian Division III teams trying to auto-promote with us.. Plus we have an easy to win match coming this weekend (Sunday) against the team in 7th.. a team called the ‘rottnest island quokkas’ who are an old team here in Oceania and their manager is on a pretty big rebuild of their own right now, and who looks to accumulating some cash too from the constant transfer activity in and out of their team.. so let’s just assume we’ll win that by 5+..

Just a really great time to be following the Mighty EVIL INC at the moment..
It really has taken good ol’ WozzaNoski far too long to figure this game out and climb to the upper echelons of Oceanian Hattrick Community!
And let us hope that it wont be a short stay up in the ‘nose-bleed’ Divisions.
It’s about time WozzaNoski and our EVIL INC started to be taken seriously in Oceania and the World..

Thanks for taking the time to read our news.

Kind Regards..

EVIL INCORPORATED Media Manager!